Wednesday, August 30, 2006
make me happy
make me sad
when ran together they turned bad.
The picture above says 'Lovin LIFE'.
Am I loving it right? :(
marfi @ 4:19 AM
Sunday, August 20, 2006
I know its late.1.01 am now and only now then I start blogging.I had'nt post anything yet since ages ago and people have long start wondering why the fuck is ayu so fucking lazy. Well lat me tell you something readers,im no equivalent to regular bloggers whom bloggged everyday with sexy or cuty pretence pictures lacing their blog.And i dont nor cant blog every trace about my life(okay maybe a littl,perhaps 10 % only) in this particular avenue whom some people call it the free exposure web page.Sorry people i just cant,and if i've offended you,I'm sorry.Most people hate me for my hot thorns on jelly words.Hey,thats my nature and there;s nothing you can change that.
Me and mother aren't talking terms.It has been longer than i expected.Although she would still prepare me my ususal hot milo and kaya bread in the morning,I need to throw the stinkist rubbish,so it's like a trade.Mother was being unresonable and ridiculous about my results.So i received a C6 for mother tounge malay and it was suppose to be something expected.Then I called her and told her about the results.And this was her words,"c6? why so bad? ur cousin got a A2.What about your friends?" HELLO! I'm whimpering here,there you are comparing.A little advise or support will be a great help okay! Obviously,the blabbering of compare and condemning comtinued even though when i took a quick nap in the afternoon.Thanks to her sick speech,i got distracted and couldnt continue on my nap."Thanks for nothing ma"
I missed my usual sunday las vegas,miami ink and boston legal.And I had to miss it today.
I hopped onto dawn and xiaxue's blog.And they both looked pathetically artificial.Never have i thougtht they were pretty,and if anyone of you out there is trying their very best to smile cutily and smear a 12 level cake of extra-fair-than-your-own-skin foundation.I might wanna label you a caucasion wanna be gone wrong.Here's a tip: Apply bird's shit as your foundation,they make wonders. : )
marfi @ 1:30 AM
Sunday, August 06, 2006
I don't know what im dealing on.For this past week,I felt like a real bitch.A real one,not as in just labelling yourself,cause that's different.It felt like the universe is crumbling below my heel,and cracks just do not seem to understand the meaning of leeway.And the next minute,I noticed my supercilious expression looking down my nose on the whole action.Maybe I'm fine,maybe I'm not.I dont know.I began to have more doubts and ifs than usual.Maybe I'm already convinced that I will never find true love and the glittering life i hoped was just pure fantasy.The reality-'selling' myself to survive-is a dehumanising grind which is just pushing me away from real love but towards a fascination with pure unintentional pleasure.Uhm.
For the mean time I'm perpetually waiting for my emotional barriers to be tested by a handsome man and choosing between thye dark path I'm on and risking everything to find my 'inner light'
Tell me readers if the things i said below are true,and if it had ever happened to you before
When we meet someone and fall in love, we have a sense that the whole universe is on our side.I saw this happen yesterdaay as the sun went down.And yet if something goes wrong, there is nothing left! No herons and no distant music.So how is it possible for the beauty that was there only minutes before to vanish so quickly.
Life moves very fast.It rushes us from heaven to hell ina matter of seconds.
marfi @ 12:17 AM